supplication

in a fishbowl they tell me     the sea is the most      powerful of things

a salt wound that cuts     deep it mars the flesh      headbutt the sea

to learn how to swim     if it doesn’t     take you first

& maybe i am swimming     maybe i am the sea     maybe my mother prayed

i do not drown     & god always listens     & if you believe he will answer

& i lay in the vastness

wala shay

kil shay 

my mother taught me to draw stars     at different starting points     i traced them

my left on top     of her right     the pencil bridging

the red sea     & all the corals     on her neck

at night i send     stars to fatima     swimming borders away

i tell her     the quran says the stars are     lanterns that ricochet the

jinn so our fates     aren’t stolen

she tells me she hopes so

ya fatima there’s no clear sky without you     try again when the world

isn’t crumbling in front of us     when the sea isn’t so scary anymore

when i can finally speak to you in a language that     sings fairouz & bts & sza

my language not too incomprehensible

my vocabulary bringing us close

ameen ameen ameen     we pray for each other     my mother whispering into the night

ya rabs ascending the seventh sky     & i pray for the future    for the bukra

for the badain     for the inshallah, if things get better     if we live long enough

for the friends miles away     for them telling me they pray every now & then

so i pray for them too     & out of my seas i recite

over & over & over again     my velars mix with glottals

& all the honey that was said to heal my throat:

allah, do you hear me?

Jood AlThukair is a writer and the editor-in-chief of Sumou (sumoumag.com), an online magazine for creative youth. Based in Saudi Arabia, she oscillates between writing and making art all while plucking pomegranates, juggling academia, and fighting for decolonization. Find her on Instagram: @jusqu.a or Twitter: @joodthu. 

Artwork by Vamika Sinha