Curdling

I can hear my heartbeat on the pillow tonight
Curdling in my ear
Trying to hop its way across
The duvet
I catch it by the wrist before it leaps out
And scampers off across the floor.

I can hear the echoes of a love washed away
Like a lighthouse on a dried-out beach.
I’m a hunched old man
In a yellow slicker
Yelling hoarsely to the boats not there
I can still hear our waves, crashing.

Do you want me to run to you?
That all too familiar magnet
Dragging me with my heels digging in and
A flirtation smeared across my mouth.
Wouldn’t it be easier for us
To give into the pull?

I can hear your laughter across continents
You laugh the loudest out of
Everyone I know,
Like a bass plugged in (electric).
You made me feel like music notes
And now?

You’re a used-to-be who shattered
All of my old definitions.
Life drew us apart like a stick snapped, so
My heart has slipped
Through my hands again
And runs circles around a darkened bedroom.

Artwork by Harriet Lee Merrion "Heart Agency"