I’m yelling goodbye to my Mother

Alexandra-Levasseur-troubles

I’m yelling goodbye to my Mother
And I think it’s hard to hear above the din;
The files sch-sch-sch
Across our fingernails and there’s the tap
And soft fizz of a hair straightener in our ears
It’s too loud to hear.

I know her face so well that it’s sometimes hard to picture it
I read once that people’s self-image is so distorted that
They’d walk past their own clone on the sidewalk without stopping
But I know, I know, I know
I look just like her.
Both of our faces are sunk into the deep pool past childhood
And into before-you-were-born so
My self-perception is wavy.

Are we all just a continuation of our Mothers?

I’m yelling goodbye to my Mother
Before goodbye has even come because there’s
A tarmac and clattering wheels to contend with.
I think my story is an arm stretching through me and into
Her high-school days and heartbreak. A clenched fist.
I know her face so well that missing her seems as silly
As missing the sky.
It’s hard to hear my goodbye.

 

Artwork by Alexandra Levasseur “Troubles”